Am I an introvert or extrovert?
I know that I am an introvert. I have known this for a long time, but how, specifically, I know this, I might have a little trouble explaining. First of all, the test that we took recently, the Jung Typology thing, told me I was somthing with the word introvert in it-an I.N.T.J. (Introverted iNtuitive Thinking Judging)-but we'll visit with that in a moment.
At any rate, my thoughts, feelings and emotions generally stay on the inside. The Typology test made me sound like a sociopath with a sparkling personallity. I think the truth lies somewhere in between. My dialogue is usually an internal one, and though I look to the outside world for clues, much of my life is felt and decided from the inside. Ive always been an inward looker, a processer, an overthinking, and a mostly solitary figure. My ways and social graces just dont always quite mesh with those of others.
The second list of information for the type indicators put forth from the Jung Typology Test-Typology Indicators- seemed a bit more spot on in places, and I found relations to everything in the opening statement on INTJs except for confident and calm. As a matter of fact, I am usually pretty self critical and at times insecure. I could see how self critical could mesh with the personality indicated here- as it is a very analytical personality, and everything is grist for the mill- but "calm" is in direct conflict with how I am most of the time. It has been stated, though, that I have an anxiety disorder, and this is probably true.
My question now becomes, does this account for the descrepancy in the area of calmness with rest of my markers, or does it indicate that I should actually be in a different classification?
The above question, however, taken as an indicator, would seem to have me firmly seated in the area of INTJ.
The Jung Typology Test's second description left me alittle skeptical after the first page, which had me sounding like some kind of scientist with all the effectiveness and potential in the word. It listed me as organized, focused, good with time management and goal oriented. This is not how I see myself. While, yes, I AM a bit of a perfectionist, with a strong drive to WANT to organize things, this is very seldom how things work out, and my life in general is marked by a fairly frantic sense of chaos. In short, I'm a mess.
It wasnt until I got down to the section on writing that some of these attractive ideas started to reconcile themselves with my actual way of life. The first big thing I noticed was that INTJs are known to spend so much time in the reflective stage, and not quite knowing where to start a paper, that they will sometimes miss starting all together. (Okay, that sounds like me). Another point of interest was how much of the focus was on the end result or conclusion, CAUSING the starting to be very difficult. (Uh Huh. Keep going). I speak often in absolutes, mostly when I write, and a little bullet point told me that I ought to soften my firm statements. I was very angry with the bullet point over this, because another little bullet point had just accused me of having difficulty accepting criticism. (Okay, now I'm mad).
But wait (and yes, I just started this paragraph with "but". Did I mention that INTJs are expected to challenge commonly held ideas and conventions?), there's more. Turns out that just below the main body of bullet points on writing is an entire section on Procrastination. Well... I'll Have to get back to you on that one...
I particularly liked the part where it stated, "Essentially, one side of the INTJ wants to explore the possibilities and the other is looking for closure." Wow. That sure is a nice, clean way to justify putting stuff off. I think I'll keep it.
After taking the Jung Typology Test, and reviewing the indicators on my results, I have to say that, for the most part, it nailed me spot on. The funny thing about this is that I do not feel limited in being so well summed up. For one thing, it is only a little free test, and I dont expect it to have all the answers by a long shot. For another, It listed alot of things that sure sounded like assets in the beggining, and proceeded to demonstrate how they could be challenges further down. I liked that. It was in the recognition of the challenges that I found something that set me at ease. I feel as though the struggles I am facing now are quite natural for a person, we'll say, in the ballpark of like me.
The struggles are infact due in part to a number of characteristics that make me worth while-or, at least, it sounds better that way. While not life altering, Im glad I took this little test, and I would recommend it to others, particularly the inrtospective kind, as we are always looking for new ways to examine ourselves. This exercise, if nothing else, has given me alittle kick in the direction of appreciating some of my little eccentricities, as far as the relm of school is concerned.
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